Lady lets her neighbor borrow her phone, unknowingly is made her vet's emergency contact and is now roped into co-hosting her dog’s Bar Mitzvah: ‘It’s Bentley's “Bark” Mitzvah…'

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  • "I accidentally became my neighbor’s emergency contact and now I’m apparently in charge of her dog’s bar mitzvah"

    This started because my neighbor Sharon got her phone stolen at Trader Joe's. She knocked on my door asking to borrow mine to call her sister. I said yes because she looked like she was five seconds from a breakdown and holding a bag of half- melted cauliflower gnocchi.
  • Three days later, I get a voicemail from a vet clinic saying I'm listed as Sharon's emergency contact. For what? No idea. I barely know this woman. I didn't even know her last name until that call. Apparently while filling. out paperwork for her new
  • phone and some other stuff, she wrote my number down as a backup and forgot to change it. Now I get updates about her elderly Shih Tzu, Bentley, who apparently has a grass allergy, IBS, anxiety around hats, and a stroller more
  • expensive than my entire wardrobe. I've never met a dog with a skincare routine until Bentley. A week later, Sharon stops me in the hallway and goes, "Quick question, would you be willing to help organize Bentley's Bark Mitzvah?"
  • I thought I misheard. I didn't. Bentley is turning 14, which Sharon has decided is spiritually equivalent to 13 in human years. She's throwing him a full-blown Bark Mitzvah. There's a rented venue. There's a tiered dog
  • cake. She's making treat bags for the other dogs in the building. I wish I was joking. She asked if I could read a short Torah passage at the event. I told her I'm not Jewish. She said Bentley
  • isn't either, but that it's about community. Now I'm getting texts like, "Can you be in charge of the kugel table?" and "I found tiny kippahs on Etsy, but I think we can DIY."
  • Yesterday she handed me a printed itinerary. It has a candle lighting ceremony, a best-dressed contest, and a playlist Sharon swears was curated by Bentley himself. I asked her what Bentley's favorite artist is. She said Enya.
  • The event is happening tomorrow in our apartment courtyard. She booked a photographer. I heard someone rented a bubble machine. There's a rumor the building's super is dressing as Moses.
  • So yeah. I let someone borrow my phone once, and now I'm apparently co- hosting a religious rite of passage for a geriatric dog with dietary restrictions.
  • I haven't even told my mom yet. She already thinks I don't meet enough normal people.
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  • Snowey212 Those last two sentences had me de d. Where's the fun in meeting normal people anyway.
  • Wonderful-Bad-4158 And here I am imagining Bentley having an anxiety attack as Sharon affixes his yarmulke in preparation of his Bark Mitzvah
  • Sentiviridian Right, that's where the "anxiety about hats" detail really comes home to roost zuis0804 Nothing a little Enya can't fix, voice of an angel
  • TreeWhisper13 This was so funny! Wish I was invited! mdshelton9 I was thinking the same thing! Lol

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